


Autumn's Arrived

by novocainlullaby



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Character Death, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-19
Updated: 2013-08-19
Packaged: 2017-12-24 01:49:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 746
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/933727
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/novocainlullaby/pseuds/novocainlullaby
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's been two, very long years.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Autumn's Arrived

**Author's Note:**

> i know natasha can't have kids okay it's for the sake of the fanfic

"Daddy? Why do you only keep the red leaves?"

"I try and match them to your moms hair color..but I can never get the right shade."

"Why not?"

"Well kiddo, it's because there's nothing original about your mother..she was always one of a kind."

_"Oh shut up. You're so corny, Clint."_

  
"What's that letter for? And why is the leaf taped to it?"

"I'm giving it to mommy today. She's been gone for two years exactly."

"Was she pretty?"

"The most gorgeous woman I've ever seen."

"Have fun talking to her today."

"I will."

Clint kissed his daughters head quickly, folding the letter up and placing it in his jacket pocket. He walked down to the graveyard where Natasha, his Natasha, was buried. The one time Fury sent her on a solo mission after their marriage. The one damn time. He swallowed harshly, his annual tears streaming down his cheeks. The rough autumn breeze seeing right through the leather material of his jacket.

 _Right under the huge oak tree._ He reminded himself, coughing.

**Natasha Barton. ? - September 20 2012. Loving wife, mother, and partner.**

His breath hitched in the back of his throat as he knelt beside the grave. "H..Hey Nat. I wrote you another letter." He let out another pained chuckle, his voice breaking and his eyes threatening to spill over even more waterworks. "You'd be rolling your eyes at me. You'd think it was really cheesy and tell me to shut up. I..I just...feel like you'd still be here if I had been better. I know it's crazy.." He trailed off, looking up at the sky and blinking rapidly to slow the creations of his tears. "I wanna read it to you. Is that okay, Tasha?" He asked and sighed when the realization dawned on him that she _couldn't._ He cleared his throat and unfolded the crumpled piece of paper, taking a quick glance at the engraving on her tombstone.

"Dear Natasha, it's been two years. And you know what? It never gets easier. I still beg for you to come back to bed so I can stroke your hair. It was always so stunning. Like it came from a bottle, but I know that it didn't. I constantly try finding your exact hair color, but nothing compares to it even in the slightest. Even our baby girls hair isn't the same color. You should see her now. Can you? She's gorgeous - a mini you! Your snarky attitude was placed in her. I miss your voice, too. I'm starting to forget, and that scares me. I loved your voice and I don't wanna lose that too. I've lost too much.

I still have a couple videos when you were pregnant. You talked to her. Our little bug. You were so goofy when you were pregnant. I was so happy, Tasha. And you know what? You were too." He paused, thumbing away the tears and sniffling, kneeling beside the grave. "She doesn't remember you either, and it breaks my heart. Our own baby can't even remember you and I hate that. I'm trying to incorporate you more and more into her life. And I know what you're thinking and if you were here I know what you'd tell me. But I can't, Nat. I can't move on and I can't find someone better because you were the best. You are the best. You giving birth was the strongest challenge you ever faced. I'm so proud of you, darlin'.

I miss you, bub. I miss you more and more every day. Will it get easier? Fury never briefed us on this. I love you, doll. I love you, I love you, I love you.

I love you.

Don't forget my voice, okay? Don't forget like I am. It's a scary thing, darlin'.

I'll see you soon."

He smiled faintly, scrubbing at his eyes again. "Shit, Tash. See what you make me like? An old bum like me and you get him on his knees." He settled the letter down on her grave, kissing the top of the rock. "I'm sorry I'll never get to kiss you again. I can't stroke your hair or rub your back, or kiss you all over like I used to." He sobbed, shaking his head. "I'm sorry, Nat. It's not fair, baby. It's..It's not fair." He choked out, biting down hard on his lip, to the point where he drew blood.

"I love you. Goodbye, Nat."


End file.
